am I blue?

yes I'm blue

I was supposed to be flying to Orlando at the end of the week for a brief but much-needed visit with my cousins, Emma and Cora. After their Mom, my aunt died in October of 2005, I helped their Dad take care of them. I essentially co-parented them for about a year. Then, last October they moved to Florida and soon after I moved home to Kansas. I know I did the right thing. I don't like Orlando. I don't much like the heat of living in the South. I did a lot of healing in Kansas that I don't think could have occured as quickly anywhere else. But I miss those girls every single day. Sometimes I miss them so much it hurts. But due to some unforseen expenses earlier this year, I won't be going to visit this week.
I will see them in October when we go to my brother's wedding. It will be almost exactly a year since the last time I saw them. We still talk and text pretty often. But it's not the same, of course. I never understood when someone said that their heart was elsewhere with another person. I do now, all too well.